well, shit.

I am going to start this whole thing off with saying that I have absolutely no idea what the hell I am doing.

My mother told me to write a blog, so here I am.

I am not the kind of girl who grew up doing what my mother told me to do, to be fair I don’t think that many of us are.

She has told me not to touch the fireplace because it was hot, to be nice to people, to always respect people in positions of authority and my friends parents. She told me to always ask before I used something that wasn’t mine. She told me to be smart about important decisions. That I should always eat my vegetables, drink enough water and get plenty of sleep at night. If I am totally honest, I probably listened to her about 80% of the time, if that.

When my mother told me to do things I was always defensive, I wanted to be independent and “grown up.” I always thought I knew what was best, and if I wanted to stay up all night watching Supernatural re-runs and only get 2 hours of sleep there would be no repercussions at all. I would still be on top of my game at school and I would ace the test I spent absolutely no time studying for. I thought that I already knew what the world was like and I already knew what my body needed to be healthy. I was always okay only drinking 2 glasses of water a day and, if you believe hard enough, potatoes can pass as a vegetable. I have a bad habit of removing the filter from my head to my mouth. I constantly find myself saying things that I don’t really mean, and hurting people’s feelings, people I truly care about, and on a less dramatic note I swear, I swear way too much.

My mother was someone I always wanted to defy. When I didn’t get something I wanted or if I thought she was being unfair, or picking favourites between my siblings and I, I was cruel. Between the ages of thirteen and seventeen I was a “devil child” as she puts it. We can blame it on hormones, or high school. We can blame it on the friends I had or the hobbies I was interested in, but when it comes down to it, I just really didn’t want to listen to my mother. I wanted to prove to her that I was an adult, and that I knew what I needed

“But why now Sarah, why listen to her now?”

Because somewhere along the lines of being a total disaster and actually doing something kind of right, I realised that the only times I was doing really well and I was actually happy, was when I had listened to my mother. When I was trying to save up to travel she told me to work hard, to save, to live on a budget. She told me to drink less, which never actually happened because if you know me at all you know that drinking less is never, ever an option. But, when I listened to my Mum, I had results and I managed to get across the ocean. My mother, when it comes down to it, will always be the smartest women in my life. She knows what is best for me, and she knows what steps I need to take to get to where I want to be, that’s why she is my mother.

So when I shared with her that I maybe, one day, way down the line, wanted to be a writer, she fully supported me. She told me that to do that, people would actually need to read the things that I write, even if I think they are total and absolute shit. So I made the executive decision to listen to my mother, and I have my fingers crossed that this is another one of those times where she is right and I might not look like a total idiot.

So this is what you get.

I am not going to build this up as something that it is not, it is a blog. Simple as that, It is an internet page being plagued by a 19-year-old girl living in a different country with a bad habit of never doing my laundry on time. I am going to make mistakes in grammar, spelling, general knowledge on how to actually write something that doesn’t fully butcher the English language.

Saying that, if you think you might enjoy reading about the stupid things I do, or even things that might be somewhat exciting, by all means, read on. Because, at the end of the day, I’m just here. I’m just trying to do something worth while that might let me live in a nice apartment one day.

Sarah